Deciding how to present yourself on a dating website might be confusing for some people. You have to find the balance between trying to look fun, desirable and decent. One strike and you’re out. The wrong photo means everything in the online dating world, and no matter how compelling your profile info might be, a mirror half-naked selfie might ruin everything.
Online dating experts share a few tricks that might help you get things going.
The shirtless shot
Shots of your six pack have an expiration date. If you’re an 18-year-old male with an amazing body, a shirtless photo is a definite YES. You will be twice more likely to be contacted than an 18-year-old who isn’t showing his abs. But watch out – the positive effect of abs decreases as you get older. A shirtless 40-year-old won’t look so attractive in most cases, no matter how much of a hunk he is. Adult women who are looking for love don’t look at an ab shot the way they used to when they were 18. To them, a shirtless shot is more of a sign that particular man is conceited, self-obsessed, a flirt, or even a cheater. Yes, they will judge you that way, and there’s nothing you can do about it. A mirror shirtless selfie is one of the worst photos you could post, if you’re an adult male.
Skip the group photos
Posting many photos with your friends might seem like a good way to show your potential dates that you have a social life and an outgoing personality. In fact, having someone else in your photo with you decreases your chances of getting contacted by 42 percent. This percent goes even higher if you’re posting photos with friends of the opposite sex. People will assume those are your exes or your current lovers. It’s just how it is. If you post such a photo as your profile pic, you can be sure your online dating game is very close to being over.
Leave your pets out of the picture
You might assume everybody loves animals, but sadly, this is far from the truth. Many people will skip your profile because you have your pet with you on your profile photo. Turns out furry buddies are even worse than human ones when it comes to choosing the photos for your online dating profile. Research has shown that including a pet pic in your profile lowers your contact rate by 53 percent! Nontraditional animals are even worse. Check out Tinder Guys with Tigers – there’s a whole page dedicated to bashing guys who have included tigers in their photos on Tinder.
Be interesting, but don’t go into cliches
The best photos are the ones that show you living your life. Whether it’s hiking, public speaking, cooking, at least one activity photo is a must. People have to assume you don’t spend your days in front of your pc, they need to see a proof of you being a “normal”, fun person.
BUT, if you were thinking about posting a photo of you in front of the Eiffel Tower, or a scuba-diving photo, you might want to reconsider. Much like tigers and various reptiles, some destinations have become so common among millennials that they’ve simply lost their glamour and they will make you look only as interesting as the next guy/girl.
“Those are the cliché pictures because they’re so overdone,” said a 34-year-old Washingtonian who has been online dating for eight years. But it’s a tough line to walk, because, she added, a London telephone booth photo could prompt a match to say: “Oh, I’ve been there too!”
What’s the difference? It’s the photo itself. If you think about it, EVERYONE’S Disneyland photos look the same, just as everyone’s Eiffel Tower photos look the same. While a photo that’s been taken in London, but doesn’t scream out “I’m like everyone else”, allows you to look like a person who travels a lot, but isn’t pretentious about it.
Be pretty, but not too pretty
When people see a perfect-looking woman on an online dating site, they tend to avoid talking to this woman. Why? Well, they automatically consider her high-maintenance, they assume she has thousands of men chasing after her, and finally, they don’t always BELIEVE that beauty is for real.
The solution? Don’t look too polished in the photos. Don’t use filters to make yourself look better than you do, avoid selfies because people already know a selfie can distort your face and make you look more attractive than it already is.
Finally, if you’re a gorgeous looking woman just as you are, and you look just as gorgeous in your photos, then, by all means, show your beauty and flaunt it. You wouldn’t want to attract an insecure guy anyway, so you won’t miss out much. Only the bravest men dare to contact the most beautiful girl in ‘the room’, so you can be sure the men who contact you have a lot of qualities and self-confidence.
None of these are hard and fast rules, of course. Some daters would argue that you should just be yourself, even if that means putting your best duck-face forward. Just don’t say we never warned you.
Source: The Washington Post